Hi My Name is.....

If you have been on any of my social media so you could have no that I've changed my name. Not just my username but my actual first name. Is something I thought about for a while and contemplated for a long time. But I needed to do this as a first step into healing. Let me explain.

Growing up I would always make the joke that I would change my name and not tell anybody because I was so tired of everyone calling my name to fix something. I know this sounds selfish but there's a lot more into that than how it sounds but it's only I said a lot. Today every time someone will say my name Allison or Allie. I would freeze up and start having panic attacks because of constantly being called on to do something or they're yelling at me. It's gotten to the point where even hearing it in my head will make me have a mental breakdown. I never necessarily hated my name but more the meaning behind it and how it's been used. Allison is a pretty name but I hate how not sounds and I hate hearing it so I'm changing it. I don't want people who actually care about me loving to say and make me have a panic attack for you I want to be the better version of myself And to do that I need to make that version of myself and after going back and forth with a lot of different things I decided Daisy.

Why did I choose this name? There's a lot of different reasons one because it looks and sounds cute but not only that the meaning behind the daisy itself. It means A New beginning and that is what I'm searching for and hope so find a version of myself that doesn't have to live scarcely every day. But it also symbolizes hope. Which is something I look for every day.

With this being said it actually will take a year so to do it officially in my only given there's a lot of steps to do but I started accepting it and using it online and seeing how I like it first. Another question that I'm sure you're going to get is am I going to tell my family and the answer to that is no. When it does get changed legally if they find out but I'm not going out of my way to tell anybody. If it doesn't seem fit for them to know then I'm going to keep it that way.